Beatfag - "Last Night I Dreamt of Fecal Matter" - CDr - Foamru666er / Grel - 2001
You know those albums that you can't stand to play, but also can't stand to toss away? Whether for some kitschy, nostalgic reason, or merely the fact that you be a pack-rat, everyone has at least a handful of these dandy daemons lying around or tucked safely away, prying eyes not to see.
Well, in a turn of the mind and the head alike, this record, a collaborative split between labels (?) Foamru666er and Grel and (from what I gather) sounds concerning one Jay Schleidt and one Yobleart, is in essence an album of discerning taste. I say this because like the aforementioned spine-shudder albums that you never want to hear, this is one that you cannot hear.
Etched onto the bottom of the CD by a careful hand is the word 'leperection'. While certainly interesting and pejorative (in a good way, mind you) to the sexually-stimulated masses of paraplegics across the plent, this tasteful word prevents me from hearing the sounds encased within the gorgeous cum nutty package. What I can only imagine is a broken, burnt piece of a spirograph / stencil set (pink, orange and yellow) sits atop a handpainted army-fatigue hued placemat, serving up treats that I am unfortunately unable to take a tongue to. The CDr, when entered into any given player, whirrrs, whirrrs, whirrrs and clicks, but will not play.
Perhaps I am just not meant to experience these (no doubt) graciously wonderful sounds. Perhaps this is what I get for jokingly saying 'send me unplayable objects' on the Contact page a while back. Perhaps nothing. All I know is that when (if ever) I do get a chance to hear this album, it will be a joy untold, a day to remember, and a night spent dreaming in only the most superb shades of Brown.
BEATFAG (?)
